Thursday, April 8, 2021

The Maggot - Live Matter in a Dead Body - Issue #4

 The Maggot

Live Matter in a Dead Body”

Issue No. 4 November 24, 1941 Published by “The Maggots”

The Gay Nineties Revue”

In as much as it is the policy of THE MAGGOT to bring to light any true facts that we feel need presenting, we want to make it clear that we do not lay the responsibility for the over-conservative policies of the institution at the feet of only the administrators – no indeed – a good share of the credit is due our board of trustees with special recognition going to the executive committee.

Of the thirteen members on that fine body, seven are eligible for the degree “old faithful” each having served at least twenty years – in fact, the fortieth anniversary of one, namely the maternal parent of our illustrious political protege, will be observed next year. It is of extraordinary interest that this good member is the only one who holds a position on six of the trustee committees. No other trustee who has served only fifteen or twenty years and consequently whose conservatism can be doubted is allowed to take that much responsibility for running the school. Those irresponsible and unreliable liberals and new-comers who have served only four to eight years are allowed on at most three committees, and Carl Voigt, a truly liberal “scoundrel”, cannot be trusted on any committee. The “terrible thirties” are not as qualifying as the “gay nineties”.

Last year when we were without a president, what was the excuse that our good vice president presented for the slow action of the board? Oh yes, he said that it was so hard to get them together. Bear in mind however that all the members of the executive committee are Huron residents. It is a private hypothesis that the reason they couldn't get together was because one took his nap at two and another his at three, an thus anyone can see that a meeting was simply impossible.

As long as Huron college is run by a group of oldsters who are actually senile, we can never hope for a progressive school. The last issue of the Alphomega reminds us that we should be duly reverent of our faithful administrators and those who have given their lives to the institution, but how can we be expected to be reverent of policies that have not changed since the turn of the century.

In case the administrators and trustees are inclined to laugh this off, let us remind them that 90 per cent of the Huron business men questioned thought that the college was hopelessly outdated and run by antiquated, debilitated, senile individuals.

We Love Our Student Lounge

Yes, we love our student lounge! It has everything we need to lounge. There are some lovely, comfortable straight-back chairs to relax in; a few desks to write on; and some beautiful ebony black-boards to look at. We are right across the hall from the library where we can make all the noise we want. We could smoke too, only it seems the trustees are afraid it might stunt our growth. We might be able to have a nickleodeon too, only the faculty would probably move it down to that much-used lounge of theirs. We don't need a coke dispenser because the walk over to the store does us good, and besides all our organizations have plenty of money – they don't need the added income. Yes, this is a haven of rest for the scholastically weary.

The trophy room of our gymnasium is an ideal place for our proposed plan. Installation of a nickleodeon, a few pieces of appropriate furniture, distinctive decorations, and a coca-cola dispenser would satisfy any student body. Frequently planned evening get-togethers of “the gang” at such a place would help to “Keep the College on the Campus”, give the students a chance to become better acquainted with one another, and prevent the frequenting of suburban clubs.

We are convinced the “Little Student Union” would work, and why should any administration hesitate to put it into operation. Surely campus organizations would be only too glad to have such a place on our campus, and would assist financially in getting it started.

If we want to put Huron on top, we must keep abreast of the other schools. We must make at least a few improvements. This school has some fine incorporated rules an regulations, but evidently it has quite forgotten that is students no longer come to school via horse and buggy. Huron college NEEDS the “Little Student Union.”


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